It is already the 5th of January, 2015. 2014 has come and gone. As I sit here at my laptop reflecting on the last year, I can confidently say that it was a year of change and a year of healing.
I came into 2014 learning the news that I would no longer be able to teach. This has earlier been blogged about and it caused great confusion. I lost my identity. I had always taught - that was what I did. Being forced to stop work by my doctor, who had my mental and physical wellbeing at heart, was also hard to cope with. Looking back, he did the right thing but I couldn't see it at the time. I mourned what I had lost and had to adjust to the change - another challenge for me!
The year consisted of many therapy sessions challenging my thought processes. It was a year where I pushed myself out of my comfort zone and did things I had never been brave enough to do before. I grew through these experiences.
In my therapy sessions, as well as dealing with ways to help cope with my anxiety attacks, I also delved into the past. It was time, at the age of 46, to go back through my life. I had to deal with growing up with Crouzon syndrome, in a society that was not always accepting of my facial difference.
As layer upon layer of my experiences, both good and bad, were peeled back, I could feel healing taking over my mind and heart. A few meetings with past influential people also occurred to coincide with this healing, which led to more healing. With that healing came a new found feeling of wholeness and confidence and an acceptance of who I am. I made the decision that no longer was I going to be embarrassed that I was born with a craniofacial syndrome. No more was I going to let it stop me from achieving my heart's desires. No more did I have to be shy because of my syndrome. No more would I be ashamed that I suffered from anxiety and depression.
I have no idea what 2015 will bring but I know I am entering it as a new woman with hope and the belief that what I put my mind to I will achieve - as a wife, a mother, a writer, the Our Faces Support founder and as a friend.
Happy New Year!
© 2012 by Jenny Woolsey